The Truth About Fairness
“Live so that when your children think of fairness, caring, and integrity, they think of you.” -- H. Jackson Brown, Jr.
Life is full of misconceptions. One of the biggest I know of is fairness. When we are children, fairness is extremely important to us. Parents, how many times a day do you hear, “That’s not fair!”? Funny how we were only concerned about things being fair for us, never about them being fair for others.
My children grew up hearing me say, “There is no fair.” Life is not fair, nor was it meant to be. Most people define fair as everyone being treated the same way and everyone getting the same things. That is not how life works. Let’s look at some of the differences that we need to address in life…fairly.
“Fairness is not an attitude. It’s a professional skill that must be developed and exercised.” -- Brit Hume
1) Fairness / Equality.
The term fairness does not mean equal. To be fair to people you need to see that every one can achieve if they apply the same effort. That means I cannot look at someone who is successful and think it is not fair that they have gained success but I have not, if I have not worked for it. Life is not a level playing field. If you want to succeed in life you must be willing to pay the price for it. That is fairness.
Equality means that as a people, we are all equal. As Americans we know our founding statement is that we were all created equal. As people, we should have the same rights and freedoms to live our lives as we see fit. That however does not mean we all are equal in talent or skill or knowledge. As a person you are unique and have your own talents and skills. Some things you can do and some you can not do. You can demand equality all you want, but the fact is you can not be anything other who you are. You have the opportunities to develop that and succeed with that, but you can not become someone else.
“These men ask for just the same thing, fairness, and fairness only. This, so far as in my power, they, and all others, shall have.” -- Abraham Lincoln
2) Mercy / Justice.
Christopher Columbus said, “I am a most noteworthy sinner, but I have cried out to the Lord for grace and mercy, and they have covered me completely. I have found the sweetest consolation since I made it my whole purpose to enjoy His marvelous presence.” I can think of no better example of the difference between mercy and justice that our relationship with Jesus Christ.
The whole of the human race, no matter the country, economic status, race, gender or anything else, we have all fallen short of the standard God has set for us. Sin, the violation of God’s law has overtaken the world. God being just must serve punishment on all who broke that law (us). God is also merciful and sent His own Son, Jesus, to die in our place that our debt may be paid. I don’t know about you, but I would much rather have mercy than justice.
“All great things are simple, and many can be expressed in a single word: freedom, justice, honor, duty, mercy, and hope.” -- Sir Winston Churchill
3) Others and Self.
People who are concerned that they experience fairness in life have a very hard time doing anything for others. The whole act of putting others first is a wiliness to deny yourself fairness. Coach John Wooden puts it clearly when he said, “Consider the rights of others before your own feelings, and the feelings of others before your own rights.”
It’s one of those strange things in life, that selfish people care the most about fairness and yet do the most to deny it to others. Treat all people fairly and yes, you too should be treated fairly, but remember that fairness is not equality. You do not have to have the same as someone else, just the right to give them more.
“Only a life lived for others is a life worthwhile.” – Albert Einstein
4) Pride / Proud.
As a person who believes in personal achievement, I am the first to tell you that pride is not always bad. We should have a degree of pride in what we do and who we are so as to keep the standards we live by high. However, pride is not looking down on others. When we start to think we are better than others we loose our pride to arrogance and any sense of fairness is gone.
Take pride in what you do and be your best. Paul Bryant said, “If you believe in yourself and have dedication and pride – and never quit, you’ll be a winner. The price of victory is high but so are the rewards.” Be proud of who you are and always remember that the person next to you is just as special as you are. They are your equal and must be treated fairly.
“The ideas I stand for are not mine. I borrowed them from Socrates. I swiped them from Chesterfield
© Jack Hickey 2010
Comments
Post a Comment