The Worst of All Bad Habits and Three Ways to Overcome it
" Feeling sorry
for yourself, and your present condition, is not only a waste of energy
but the worst habit
you could possibly have."
- Dale Carnegie
(1888-1955)
Author/Speaker
There are
more bad habits that a person can have than there is time to list them. Bad habits range from things that inconvenience
us, like talking too much, looking into every mirror we see and biting our
nails to ones that can destroy us like lying, cheating and substance abuse. However, over all there is one bad habit that
will bring you down and take away your hopes of success faster than all
others. That is the habit of self-pity. The attitude that says, "Poor me."
"I can never get a break". and "Nothing ever works out for
me."
Those who are caught in the
habit of self-pity are in a trap that few have been able to escape. It has caused many to fail at their purpose
in life, kept them lonely and broken and for some, even lead to them taking
their own life. However, as strong as
this force is, you can prevent it and even turn it back with determination and
hard work. Here are three powerful way
to keep self-pity away from your door.
1) Think of others
Self-pity happens when our focus
is on our self too much. When we keep
looking inside and feeling bad we always get a distorted picture that after a
while seems real to us. Journalist, Anne
Roiphe said, " Self-pity is never useful. It tends to distort like a
fun-house mirror." This is why
those who are trapped in self-pity tend to have a distorted view of everything. The best way to fee yourself from self-pity
is to put your focus on others.
The only way that we avoid thinking
of our self all the time is to think of others; what we can do to help them and
how to make them happy. Those who have
found the secret of the joy of service, never fight with self-pity because they
spend their time with others in mind.
2) Stay on purpose
Success-minded people know that
they are here on this planet for a purpose.
That purpose is for good and will make things better for everyone in
some way. When we keep that purpose in
mind we are driven to do good and to find meaning in life. Self-pity creates the illusion that life has
no real meaning and that we are only here to be abused and hurt. It is little wonder that this leads to such disastrous
ends.
Keep your purpose, your dream
always before you and see that you have something to achieve. You were not placed here to fill a space but
to make a difference. Success-minded
people have no time for self-pity, they have a world to change.
3) Establish good habits
We do not live in a vacuum. If we are to get rid of bad habits we must
replace them with good, productive habits.
Just as self-pity is the most destructive of all habits, excellence is
the best of all habits. When we strive
for excellence we improve in every area of life. The Greek philosopher, Aristotle said, "We
are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit."
We make excellence a habit by
settling for nothing less from our self.
We do well because we expect to do well.
This has nothing to do with ego.
It is not, "How great I am", but "How great can I
be?" We will never be perfect, but
in striving for perfection we can become excellent and do something good for
all the world.
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